november…really?

i was asked by a friend why i don’t update this thing anymore.

so here goes…
have you ever had one of those moments when you wonder what you’re doing?
and you feel as though you have no control?
that’s where i am.
was.
but i realized i’ve got more control than i thought i did.
even though i’m 24 and feel like i’ve accomplished just about nothing…i have.
i’ve been on my own, 1400 miles from any family, doing my best
to make it.
to give myself more opportunities.
to make my momma proud and realize she did better at raising me than she thinks.
to live life, make mistakes and get my heart broken.
because all of these things make me stronger and stronger day by day.
this past year couldn’t have been more difficult,
but i’ve came farther than i would’ve ever imagined.
so many times i held myself back from being happy or experiencing new things just because i wanted to keep myself safe.
but you can’t do that.
granted it’s a lot easier to not get hurt,
but whether it be a breakup, school or a job, even if it fails…
the experience is worth it and you can still go on.
i’ve learned to try pushing myself to the limit
even when i don’t think i can go any further.
let yourself live life.
a little heart break and trial will only make you a better person in the end
that’s all.
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